WARNING: This post might ruffle some feathers. If you don’t like it, feel free to take your opinions for a long walk off a short pier. For the rest of you, grab the popcorn.
We all know the old saying, “Stupid is as stupid does.” Or the ever popular, “Once a cheater, always a cheater.” Now, I’d be naive to think the latter is always true. I firmly believe that no one, with a few exceptions, starts their day hoping to hurt people. But every single one of us has a skeleton or two hanging in our closets. A few seem to enjoy stacking the skeletons to the ceiling and having an overflow in the attic.
I’m far from perfect and I know a lot of things that would shock people. Two months ago I discovered a professional cheater in the midst. I’ve known this guy for decades and I was not surprised. The level of disrespect given to his significant other was astonishing. As the third party in the triangle, it made me angry, not towards him (in that moment all feelings, good or bad, were nonexistent). My anger was for her. She was fully invested in this man and he took a proverbial dump on her heart. To this day, I don’t know if she found out or if they’re still together. That’s not of any concern to me. What I worry about is why people keep deceiving those they claim to love.
Once the damage is done, recovery is nearly impossible. I applaud those who work through it and stay together. But going back to what hurt you will most likely only hurt you more. There’s a definite learning curve though. I’ve suffered at the hands of toxicity along the way. However, once it becomes clear and you set boundaries for yourself, going back is not an option. It’s hard to be strong, to move past the emotional ties and to free yourself from what was holding you back. During the anguish, great opportunities with amazing people are bound to be missed. But do yourselves a favor, be stronger than your fear and let people in. You never know, they may end up being your safe place to land.